I was in Cyprus on holiday and had a lot of thinking time. I was wondering if I should make a podcast in the guise of Stephen Hawking.

I thought, it would be well funny. Listening to Stephen Hawking talking about his adventures snowboarding, or roller skating. The Hawkster chatting about his days out ice skating or down the pub.

Turns out… someone beat me to it. Just google it. It’s out there somewhere.

Well annoyed. Why have things already been invented that I invent?

I once though about inventing a cat flap that only opens to certain cats…. already done with infrared collars.

I once invented an inflatable tent too, but that’s already been done.

Anyway, nevermind.

I’ve cheated this blog so that the times are right, but I’m posting this from the future relative to the date on this blog.

That is, I’m posting it _to_ the past…..

Anyway, just spent 2 weeks in Cyprus and had a really nice time.

I saw a dead cat. Well, my girlfriend saw it…. didn’t report it. Loads of people saw it… didn’t report it. She told me….. I didn’t report it… why get involved eh?

Just stared at it from a safe height on the balcony. Saw a mother notice it and look completely disgusted as her daughter approach it….. I don’t think they bothered reporting it either.

10 minutes later, the Mogster had vanished. Maybe they do have nine lives…..

There was this well noisy family ruining everyone’s stay. Like the Gallaghers or something.

It’s easy to blame the parents, and that’s what I’ll do. Absolutely no parental skills at all.

I reckon there are families on “When mothers go ape shit” that are better parents.

Anyway, really nice holiday except for the fact I hated spending anytime within ear-shot of them.

Also…. Agia Napa looked well shit. Only went for a few hours, and all I saw was fish and chip shops and All-day-breakfasts.

Maybe I’m getting snobby, but so what?

At least I don’t laugh at my child when they fall over in a hotel corridor.